Mindless
It’s a struggle to fit it in a tight dress and wear stilettos just to dance around and sweat all night. Why do women subject themselves to such unnecessary torture? Why does a drinking spree always end up on the top of a “How to Get Over an Ex” list in Cosmo? Irritation overcomes me as I struggle to zip my black bodycon. I hear “Lonely Together” by Avicii play and frantically answer my phone.
“Hey, hey, sorry. I’m almost done.”
“No girl, it’s fine. Take your time. We already have a table here. Just making sure that you’re coming.”
“Yes, I’m coming, I promise. How’s Rachel?” I asked while slipping into my black stilettos.
“She’s not that okay, but I think finally having you come will make her feel better.”
“CADEN? CADEN, IS THAT YOU?” shrieked the other girls over the background.
“Yep. Hi! I’m already booking. I’ll be there in half an hour, I guess.” I put the phone down and actually start booking a ride. It’s been a long time since I went for a night out with my friends, I don’t know if it will be awkward but good thing tequila always rids me of my timidity.
Three minutes before the taxi arrives, I take a last look at my reflection — a backless black dress short enough to enunciate my long legs and my broad shoulders, a ponytail to project a smaller face shape, and enough make-up to conceal the dark circles under my eyes. Average but presentable.
The taxi reeked of old leather and elderly perfume. I didn’t want to seem rude to the cab driver and spray my own perfume inside the car. I mentally slapped myself as I remembered the horrid fact that I wasn’t able to eat dinner because of how agitated I was with preparing myself for the night. Crap. I don’t really have a high tolerance for alcohol. Not eating before a drinking spree lowers it more. I try to compose myself throughout the ride.
The loud EDM music and the bright neon lights blinded me as I entered Black Market. Bodies crashed as the remix of Side Effects echoed through the club walls. Millenials bobbed their heads to the beat and I just kept on thinking why so many people had to fill their existential dread on this Friday Night through booze and boobs.
I narrowed my eyes and tried my best to spot our table. “CADEN!!!” Someone shouted behind me. I look around and see Priscilla standing on the dance floor holding a Double Black.
“Where’s our table?” I yelled. She points her index finger to the exclusive area upstairs and I see Alyssa waving at me. I raise my thumb and signal Priscilla that I’ll go ahead.
The smokescreen still perpetuated my eyes. I had to sheepishly walk through the crowd along the staircase. A guy wearing a white polo bumps my shoulder with “unintentional” force. I halt for a moment and narrow my eyes at him. I was peeved. The neon blue hues exposed a smirk he made as he looked back. I shrug him off and make my merry way. As difficult it is walking through the dark; I finally arrive at our table.
Rachel’s plump figure greets me as she stands up to give me a big hug. We part and I caress her cheeks and fix her long dark brown locks. I force a smile. “How are you?”
“I’m hurting so much Caden but I don’t wanna drag down everyone’s mood tonight, okay?” She replied with all the emotional strength she could have possibly gathered. Her eyes had darker circles around it and the eye shadow barely hid the swelling of her eyelids.
As we sat down, Alyssa blew a flying kiss towards me. I catch it and return my attention to Rachel. “I’m always here for you, girl. We can talk about it you know? How are you and how are you coping?”
“I’m not here to talk about Rob. I just wanna have some fun with you guys tonight!”
I felt aghast and gazed at Alyssa. She just raised her shoulders in surrender. I presumed she already tried talking to Rachel. Rachel has an infamous history of coping mechanisms — ranging from alcohol, drugs, and cigarettes. Self-destruction was written all over her face tonight, and I felt like we’re in for the ride too.
“I WANT THREE STRAIGHT SHOTS FOR THE FOUR OF US!” Rachel shouts. My eyes widened in distraught signaling Alyssa to do something. She awkwardly chuckles and tried convincing Rachel to take it easy. I can’t do three straight fucking shots of tequila this early in the night.
“Rach, can we calm down? I haven’t eaten dinner. I don’t want to get wasted this early.” I begged. Before Rachel could retaliate, Priscilla comes running towards the table and immediately drops on the couch. Her neon halter top glowed in the dark because of the LED lights in the club, further accentuating her anterior “assets”.
“GIRLS! I met this group of guys downstairs and they want to buy us drinks. Should I say yes or no?”
“YES!!!!!!!!!!! WHO SAYS NO TO FREE DRINKS??” Rachel swiftly declares before the DJ could drop the bass.
Priscilla turns her attention to me for consent. I feel hysterical about the whole ordeal and look at Alyssa. She smiles at me and nods, signifying her reassurance that she’ll take care of us tonight. Alyssa has always been the big sister of the group. She tells the hard truths but really takes care of all of us at the end of the day. I roll my eyes at her and raise my hands in acquiescence. Rachel hugs me with gratitude.
Priscilla stands up to fetch the group of guys who want to sit with us. I try to compose myself, fix my ponytail, and sit straight. Alyssa brushes her bob and puts some burgundy lipstick.
At the behest of Rachel, the three of us take another shot.
I instantly recognize one of the four guys walking towards our table — it was the dude who I bumped into earlier, the one wearing the fit white polo. The brighter lights in our area aided him to also noticing me, judging from how he smirked at me. The group comes closer and the dude in the white polo glowed. The gleam highlighted his lean and tall build. He had broad shoulders and toned arms. His glasses could not conceal the piercing stare he directed at me.
“Girls, this is Chase and his friends, Lionell, Paolo, and Aleister.” Apparently, the man I bumped into was Aleister. The guys were decent looking. Lionell was the shortest but had a muscular build complimented by a gray muscle tee. Paolo was tall and lanky. He sported a ¾ navy blue shirt and some black jeans. Chase went full bohemian with his patterned tee, shorts and boat shoes. The getup suited his Filipino-Chinese aesthetic and thick hair.
Priscilla wrapped her right arm around Chase’s left arm. This is her nonverbal communication of saying, “dibs”. The guys sit in front of us with Aleister directly in front of me.
“Hi guys! I’m Rachel!”
“Alyssa.”
“My name is Caden.” I said coldly.
“Nice name. Wish you also had better eyesight.” Aleister replies arrogantly. Rachel gives a puzzled look while the boys let out a few chuckles.
“Your friend here collided with me really hard while going upstairs. She even had the audacity to glare at me and not apologize.”
“Excuse me?? I had the audacity?” I protested. Priscilla gestured me to calm down. Aleister caught it.
“No, sorry it’s fine. I like women with fire anyway.”
I rolled my eyes to the farthest corner that they can roll to. He kept on staring at me with a smug look on his face as if he was deliberately trying to vex me.
“Since we already know one another, why don’t we take shots?” Rachel reaches for the Jose Cuervo on our table and starts pouring out shots for everyone like a madwoman.
“Let’s do the three shots!” Rachel shouted. I look at her with disbelief and looked at Priscilla with even greater terror as she easily agreed to this madness. Alyssa scratched her head and opted to ride with the disarray as she still deemed everything manageable. I don’t.
“DAMN YOU GIRLS SEEM TO BE STRONG DRINKERS” exclaimed Paolo as he sucked on a lemon slice.
“Not too bad yourself!” Alyssa is obviously flirting. Her reassurance is fading.
“Let’s finish this bottle so we can get a new one!” Priscilla was foolish enough to suggest. Everyone else concurred. To be honest, I would have agreed to it too if not for my empty stomach or maybe it was something else. Maybe my anxiety stems from my peeve for Aleister? I felt tense when his group joined the fray. I guess tonight’s party left no room for my skepticism. I drink.
One shot.
Two shots.
Three shots.
A fourth one.
Deafening jeers and EDM music.
Loss of physical sensation from my fingers to different parts of my body
Feverish internal temperature
This midnight mayhem seemed all too familiar.
Priscilla making out with Chase. Alyssa getting a cigarette break with Paolo. Rachel having a chugging competition with Lionell.
And where was I?
My field of vision felt obscure. My feet were staggering, my face feels damp, and my body… my body was inclined against another’s.
Intoxication physically numbs one’s senses but elevates the internal desire to feel more. What a paradox. I can feel my libido elevating. Not good.
His hands were caressing my thighs, and my abdomen. I felt his groin as I pushed my ass against Aleister, harder with every beat. He was breathing against my nape as my hips swayed to the beat. I wanted to feel him more and my dress was starting to get in the way. Before I turn into tonight’s Black Market succubus, Rachel pulls me away from Aleister or did she pull Aleister away from me?
“ALEISTER. DUDE. Lionell said, said that you, you have some good stuff for us tonight?”
Aleister chuckles and nods. I have no idea what they’re talking about. My drunkard of a friend runs towards the stairs giggling like a maniac. Aleister grabs my wrist and drags me along for the ride. I swear I rammed on every person I passed by on the way back to our spot but I didn’t feel a thing.
Aleister guided me back to the couch. I crashed on his shoulders as I sat down. I felt so tired and queasy. I’m barely aware of my surroundings and my body is burning up bad — both literally and figuratively. I tried drinking some water, closed my eyes, and took a deep breath. I look around to see if our bags are still here and looked back at all the girls and the guys. No one is at full capacity anymore.
“I’M IN LET’S DO IT. CAN WE??? CAN, CAN WEEE??” It was the last thing I heard before the DJ’s bass drop. My intoxication and the club tunes seemingly impaired my senses. I saw little light orbs in my field of vision, and I didn’t know if it was the club lights or the thing that happens when someone is going to go full shit-faced after a few more drinks. Maybe it was both.
My perception still caught sight of Aleister mixing something in the drink of Rachel. Alyssa is kind of going hysterical as she kept on pointing at Rachel, and Priscilla is trying to contain the commotion. Rachel drinks the substance in the shot glass and tilts her head up and raises her arms. I’m sure she said, “FUCK YOU, ROB!!” or something along those lines from the motions of her mouth.
“You okay?” Aleister chuckled as he moved closer to me.
“I AM. Mind, mind your business.” I’m sure I said it loud enough for him to hear.
“You’re cute when you act tough you know.” He whispers into my ear. I felt a shiver down my spine and let out a small gasp but tried to regain composure.
“What are you trying to do?”
“Do you not want me close to you?” He asks as he circles his index finger around my loose hair.
“How close do you want to be with me?” I spoke into his ear. He smirks and gives me a tequila shot.
“Drink and let’s see how close I can get.” Mindless drinking has been the recurring theme of the night, so why stop now?
I drink.
