I used to think that romantic love is a “non-essential”. I guess I was wrong.
When I was young, I got dazzled by the “strong, independent, woman” narrative. I felt empowered when I hear women say that “she don’t need no man”. Right now, I still believe in that saying but perhaps its semantically correct meaning is the one I subscribe to more.
I want to fall in love with someone and I want to stay in love with someone.
I want someone to know me, all of me, every inch of me — physically, mentally, and emotionally.
I want to be known.
I want to know that there’s a person in this world who would see all of me and love me for who I am, regardless.
Likewise, I want to do the same.
I want to understand a person in a way that he will never have to explain the things he will do — because I immediately understand why he does it.
I want to know a person to the point that he won’t be afraid to say anything to me, because he knows I would listen.
I want someone to trust that I will always be there for them and I will always love them — I want to look at someone’s eyes and see that he trusts me, unconditionally and without question — as I with him.
They said that needing someone to be with makes you weak.
I used to believe this, but, after xx years of existence, I believe in the opposite.
It takes so much more courage to love someone and expose yourself to so much vulnerability.
The price of love is grief. Along with trying to know someone and being known is the possibility of a “goodbye” — not just in a “breaking-up sense” but also life’s natural consequence — death.
Loving someone for a lifetime will always meet its natural end.
The inevitable consequence of true love is its impermanence.
But despite everything, I’m brave enough to say… I want to love again.
And I look forward to the day I actually do.
I hope you do too.
